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love
happy thoughts
tankit
almost a year and nothing's changed but everything

i feel undone
i want to sleep forever and wake up
and find out things got better

it's not really bad but

i had hoped, yes, i had hoped for more
and now
now i feel so insignificant
so second best

i was okay with it the first time
but over a year
you became so much to me
and i watched

i wanted

and i watched you
find something
and now now it's not just one
but now

i'm all the less there

and its harder to feel what you say
i know you aren't lying
but
but it's been a year
and nothing changed

and i feel like that changed everything
i'm undone

if you felt what i feel
what would you think
would it scare you away
would it do anything

i don't mean to hurt
but you hurt
you don't mean to hurt
but you hurt

and i'm burying my heart within this fire
i won't stop loving you
but i can't expect anything
to be fair

i had hoped
i really hoped for more

i'm okay loving you
i'm okay with this state of things

again
i'm not number one
i'm there for you
but
only when you need me

if i withered away
what would it do?
what good is this if

and i don't know
it doesn't mean others are right
and what we have is a joke
we have something so pure

maybe i held it too dearly
cradled it in my chest
my cave
filled myself to the brim

and hoped
yes i hoped for more

i love you
please don't hurt me

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